Monday, November 29, 2010

Countdown to Up!

Let's have a new blog, shall we?

It's about this time of year where a little apprehension begins but is triggered by a period of reflection. I wonder to myself, "What is it that I had planned or projected for myself in January that I haven't done or accomplished yet that I still want to shoot for to be completed by December 31st?" I reflect on what happened each month, what I liked, what I didn't like, what I want to change. It makes me look forward to what I want next year to look like that I didn't like about this year. I think reflecting on 2010 will be more of a memory of what I DON'T want to happen in 2011 than what was good about 2010, however there were good things that happened, too.

Let's just knock out the bad/not so good things first:

1. January began with a concussion that lasted for 6+ weeks due to snow skiing without a helmet. No fun at all.
2. Residual affects on my body after being dropped on an airplane resulted in extended therapy on my hand and back.
3. I encountered too much sun while in Scottsdale, AZ and acquired 2nd degree burns on my heels from the metal on the lounge chair. Laying out in the Arizona heat resulted in a massive sunburn (and folks, I don't burn hardly ever!) to the point I had to put aloe vera on my skin every 30 minutes. I radiated heat!

4. I broke my tibia, patella, and tore my MCL. Fabulous time spent in a full leg brace while trying to maneuver a wheelchair that didn't accommodate the leg brace all at the same time. I added yet another thing to my list of "talents."

5. After doing some research about the Holocaust, I found out that in 1945, Hitler, in an attempt to avoid capture, and his mistress who he ended up marrying committed suicide on April 30th - my birthday. He was only married to his bride less than two days. Awesome moment to remember about my birthday. (Insert sarcasm.)
6. I went a year and a half undiagnosed with hypothyroidism. I had to undergo a needle biopsy on my thyroid/goiter which consisted of about 10 needles extracting samples from my neck. Do you know how much I loathe needles?

7. I spent an evening in a place I hope to never go back to again.
8. I broke my front tooth and have to continue to be careful now with how they fixed it.
9. I ended my reign as Ms. Wheelchair California.

10. I thought I almost lost my dad after he required an emergency triple bypass surgery. He had a double bypass about 15 years ago. This news devastated me, and I hope he is around for many, many more years yet he still continues to speak of dying early. And I believe if one believes something hard enough, it just may happen. :( I hope this isn't the case for my dad, though I know and have come to terms that his decisions are his choices.

11. I learned stuff about my church that I do not agree or approve of which upset me to the point I'm looking at a new church home.
12. My brother cussed out a Pastor.
13. I mourned the death of a best friend's husband to which saddens me so much because they truly completed each other. Not a week goes by where I don't think of Stewart.

14. I cried as another best friend shared with me her inability to get pregnant, even with in vetro fertilization.
15. I have potentially lost my very best friend of 13 years and her family/kids which has left me feeling extremely abandoned.

And now for the things I'm happy about and that which I've learned or accomplished in 2010:

1. I learned that not everyone is as open as I am about how they feel, nor are they as sensitive about other people's needs or desires. And when I share my part of something, it's not always received as "ok," even if admitting my part of a wrong-doing. And that in and of itself is ok. Thank you Celebrate Recovery!
2. I celebrated my 4 year anniversary of sobriety from alcohol!

3. I paid off my 5 year car loan in 2 years and now I OWN IT! Yay!!
4. I received a raise at work which allowed me a tiny bit more wiggle room than the way I was living. Thank you! Thank you!
5. I moved into a smaller place (which one may think would end up in the bad list), but it also has been a decision I made in order to help pay off my debt. The Dave Ramsey method works!
7. I am thankful that I did not repeat the day after Thanksgiving activity that happened in 2009 and have removed that unhealthy relationship out of my life completely.
8. I have gained amazing friendships with people who I feel safe with and trust with my everything that's in my mind, things I've done, or things I'm considering doing - whether good or bad. I love you, CB, EP, SB, LB, MM, TB, AC, and all of my CR friends!

9. I learned the ability to express how I feel in a honest and healthy manner without feeling guilty about how or why I feel the way I do.
10. I got to meet my second nieces, AB and GP, for the first time and fell in love, thus giving me baby fever - sort of. :)

11. I had the honor of seeing my cousin, SR-VR, get married as well as see other family members that I haven't seen in a long time, especially KR, DR, and DR!

12. I am utterly shocked, blessed, amazed, and humbled by the relationship that JSC and I have now. I praise God for her every day, and praise Him for bringing our friendship back to life.
13. I have learned to down-size in material items, and I am in control of my money rather than my money being in control of me. (Again, thank you Dave Ramsey!)
14. I was ecstatic that I got to crown my 1st Runner Up in Ms. Wheelchair CA 2009 as the NEW Ms. Wheelchair California 2010! Love you, Kumi!

15. I had the fantastic opportunity to bring in the New Year on the Kiwanis float in the Tournament of Roses Parade on New Years Day while also meeting the Grand Marshall, Captain Sully.

16. I met John Tesh, Brooke Burns, and also had the opportunity to take someone from South Africa who had never been to America surfing for the first time thanks to Oceans Healing!

As far as the next 32 days of 2010, I'm honestly looking forward to it being over and starting 2011. I know it's just another day from December 31st to January 1st, but mentally in my mind, 2010 has been one of the worst year in awhile.

However, the next 32 days are not guaranteed, so I have a few things left to accomplish that I hope to get done:

1. Finish my Christmas present to my family, though it may end up being late because of how time intensive it is.
2. I want to finish the second part of my personal inventory.
3. I'd like to get caught up on scrapbooking, however I don't think time will allow that either, but we'll see. :)
4. Be at or above my goal at my job so that I can start the new year exactly where I'm supposed to be budget-wise.
5. Get caught up in my personal written journal.