Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Reflecting on Spiritual "Ideals"

I had lunch today with one of my mentors. It's always good to sit and talk with her and get a glimpse into her relationship with the Lord as well as learn from her knowledge and wisdom as a Christian woman. I always come away with such valueable truths.

Today, we talked primarily on the subject of ideals and how we as women are sometimes too expectant that a man should have all of these qualities and characteristics that it leaves no room for God to be God or for him to be a man! The ideals of what I always thought a husband "should" be was for the most part right on, but there were other areas that I totally had a mindshift in today after talking with her. For me, a lot of these expectations came from a faulty upbring in a traditional church that was primarily focused on appearances. This is so wrong, though! God doesn't want us to act like we're spiritual! He wants it to come from the heart! These have to be character traits that are a natural part of a man, not something that's forced into him because it's what's expected by the church or other Christians. Do I want a man that always holds my hand when we pray in church for the sole reason because other men are doing it, or do I want a husband who gets up early each morning to pray for me while I sleep because he genuinely wants to and doesn't care if no one knows but me? After all, it is our relationship, not us and everyone else. What I want isn't always what I need. And, what I need is going to sustain me longer than what I want. Thank you, Jesus, for knowing this about me before I even knew it!

It's easy to see the need for change in other people when it's something you also need to change in yourself. So, allow someone to be the mirror for you, and truly ask yourself if your ideals are reachable, or if they are just something that would be nice to have, but not a deal-breaker.